#186 What To Do When You Don't Know What To Do

In this episode, I’m talking about a pattern I see all the time - not just in my clients, but in myself too.

It’s that moment when something in your business isn’t working, maybe a client didn’t sign, revenue is down, or something feels off, and your brain goes straight to:

“I don’t know what to do.”

It feels like the truth… but it’s not.

I unpack why this thought shuts down your problem-solving abilities, how it shows up in your behaviour (even when you’re experienced), and what to do instead.

If you’ve been second-guessing yourself, hesitating on a decision, or spinning in “I don’t know” confusion, this episode is for you.

 Book a consultation here, and let's start designing a business that works FOR YOU.

Link to Music Credits 
Track:                    Positive Motivation
Author:                  AShamaluevMusic (ASM)
Publisher:            CD Baby (IPI 700570289)

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Transcript

Ilonka Ras (00:00.11)
Welcome to episode 185 of the Effortless CEO Podcast. How often do you say, I don't know? Maybe a client canceled and you don't understand why. Sales are down and you're not entirely sure how to turn it around again. It's frustrating and it's also a very common place to be. I don't know is one of those default patterns we often slip into without even

realizing it and it feels like we're just being honest with ourselves, like we're just being real, that we're just stating the truth. I don't know what to do, but here's what's actually happening when you say this. You delay decisions, you lose momentum, you start overthinking or searching outside of yourself for the answer. You avoid making a move, which in essence means nothing changes.

And when you're running a business, putting off decisions really costs you in time, money, and energy. In this episode, I'm going to show you what to do when you don't know what to do so you can shift out of that mental fog and move forward with clarity and confidence. Let's go. Welcome to the Effortless CEO podcast. The only show that teaches South African business owners how to improve their operations.

and design a business that can run without them. If you're interested in leading your team more effectively, creating more operational efficiency, delivering with excellence while getting some of your life back, then you're in the right place. Here's your host, strategic intervention coach and operations specialist, Ilonka Ras. One of my favorite moments in coaching is when a client says, I don't know.

It comes up often. Why do you think the client canceled? I don't know. Why aren't your sales converting like they used to? I don't know. It's like the brain's default setting. And when this happens, I usually say, okay, but if you did know, what would your best guess be? That one question always unlocks something for my clients because we do know more than we think. Let me give you an example.

Ilonka Ras (02:25.068)
One of my private coaching clients lost a key retainer very unexpectedly. And her first thought was, I don't know what went wrong. She actually said, I don't know what happened and I don't know how I'm going to replace this revenue. So a sense of urgency kicked in. She would usually start taking quick, panicked action, questioning her pricing, pulling together a last minute offer or service that she can offer to potential clients.

and very often changing her plans. But instead we paused and I asked her the questions that I'm going to share with you here in a minute. And here is what she learned. She realized that she had been over delivering for months without addressing the scope creep and that the working relationship had started to feel strained on both sides. She actually realized that she was working with a not ideal client.

She also saw that she hadn't followed up on any of the proposals she sent out in the last two weeks. And she remembered that one of her best cash generating strategies had been a quick one-on-one audit. She's a financial coach that she offered and ran last year to her existing audience, which she could easily repeat. So we mapped out a simple plan around what she discovered.

And she didn't need to rebuild anything or add any more work to her plate. She just needed to pause long enough to access what she already knew, to tap back into the things that she already knows works. And this is the power of slowing down and asking yourself a few very simple questions. Now there are two sides of this I don't know coin. On the one side,

The I don't know comes from a grounded awareness where you understand that you don't have the full picture yet and it's not freaking you out. You're curious, you're observing, you're open to learning and this place feels good to be in as well. On the other side of the I don't know coin, it feels very heavy. It feels like you are defeated and it shows up as this anxious, overwhelming, overthinking space.

Ilonka Ras (04:43.894)
And you in essence start telling yourself that you should know, you should know the answer. You should know what you should be doing. And that is because maybe you have been in business for a few years, so you're supposed to have it all figured out. Now this mindset creates a lot of pressure and it makes not knowing feel like there's something wrong with you. Some of my clients completely shut down when they're in this space. Others...

Overwork themselves and they try to fix everything by taking a ton of action at once The problem with this I don't know where you are in overwhelm in overthinking is that you start looking for the Answers outside of yourself. So maybe you're doom-scrolling. You are spending a ton of time in research. You're sending voice notes to different people

You are binging old course content or jumping into another podcast or book, and you are hoping for a breakthrough. You're hoping that someone can just give you the answer, that someone can put you back on the right path. And so you're extremely busy. You're taking a ton of action, but you're not really making any real progress. And the thought that sits underneath all of this is I must be missing something that someone else

has the answer, I don't have the answer within myself. When you hear yourself saying, don't know, I want you to see it as a prompt and not a problem. It's actually an invitation for you to step back into your own knowledge. It's an opportunity to ask yourself better questions and find your own way forward. So here's the three questions that you can ask yourself whenever you find yourself saying or thinking, I don't know.

The first question you can ask is what do I know? What is my best guess? What are my top three theories? And what is the next small step that I can take? And the thing is when we say, don't know, your prefrontal cortex, the part of your brain that's responsible for logic and decision-making actually shuts down. But when you ask what do I know or what is true, that part switches back on.

Ilonka Ras (07:01.388)
You think more clearly, you access your problem solving skills, you make decisions from experience and not emotion. And this is how you start building trust with yourself. Not by always having the right answer, but by trusting that you have an answer. You can figure it out. Now, when you practice this consistently, you will find yourself making better decisions faster. You will stop second guessing everything and you will stop relying on everyone else to tell you what to do.

Now this doesn't mean that you never ask for help. Of course, you should get coaching, talk to peers, gather input, but do that after you've checked in with yourself first. When you ask better questions first, you will show up to those conversations with way more clarity and way more confidence anyway. You'll be in a position where you're not just handing over the control and asking someone else to tell you what to do. You will be an active participant in the process.

So the next time you hear yourself saying, don't know what to do, pause, breathe and ask yourself, what do I already know? What is my best guess? What is the next step that I can take? That's how you move forward, even when things feel unclear. And the more you practice this, the more confident and capable you will feel in your role as CEO. There is a lot of wisdom already inside of you.

You just need to give yourself a chance to hear it. If this resonated with you and you're ready to stop second guessing yourself and start making clear, confident decisions, I'd love to support you. Inside my private coaching program, we simplify how your business runs, free up your time and help you become the calmest person in the room, no matter what's happening around you. You can apply using the link in the show notes. Thank you so much for tuning in this week. I'll chat to you again next week.

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